My mom. Mothers are people who love even when you pull their hair. And I have two great mom stories. When I was here studying to get my Ph.D. and I was taking something called the theory qualifier, which I can definitively say is the second worst thing in my life after chemotherapy. [laughter] And I was complaining to my mother about how hard this test was and how awful it was, and she just leaned over and she patted me on the arm and she said, we know how you feel honey, and remember when your father was your age he was fighting the Germans. [laugher] After I got my Ph.D., my mother took great relish in introducing me as, this is my son, he’s a doctor but not the kind that helps people. [laughter] These slides are a little bit dark, but when I was in high school I decided to paint my bedroom. [shows slides of bedroom] I always wanted a submarine and an elevator. And the great thing about this [shows slide of quadratic formula painted on wall] [interrupted by laughter] – what can I say? And the great thing about this is they let me do it. And they didn't get upset about it. And it's still there. If you go to my parent's house it's still there. And anybody who is out there who is a parent, if your kids want to paint their bedroom, as a favor to me let them do it. It'll be OK. Don't worry about resale value on the house.
我妈妈。母亲是即使你们拽它们头发也仍爱你们的人。我有两个有趣的母亲故事。当我在这里攻读博士时，我要通过计算机理论资格考试，而我可以明确地说这是我一生中仅次于化疗的第二糟糕的事。 [笑] 我跟我妈妈抱怨这考试有多难，有多可怕，她只是靠过来，拍拍我的胳膊说，我知道你的感受，小鬼，可记住你爸爸在你的年龄，正在和德国人打仗呢。 [笑]我拿的博士学位后，我的母亲宣读津津乐道介绍我，这是我的儿子，他是一名博士，但不是帮助人的那种（医学博士，英语医生 /博士为同一词，译者注）。 [笑] 这些幻灯片有点暗，但是当我上高中时我决定漆我的卧房。 [显示卧室的幻灯]我一直想要一艘潜艇和电梯。了不起的是，[幻灯显示画在墙上的二次方程式] [被笑声打断] -我能说什么呢？了不起的是他们允许我去做。他们并没有不高兴。这个现在还在。如果你去我的父母家，它仍然存在。如果在座的有家长，如果您的孩子想画自己的卧室，作为对我的好意，让他们去画。没问题。不必担心房子的转售价值。
Other people who help us besides our parents: our teachers, our mentors, our friends, our colleagues. God, what is there to say about Andy Van Dam? When I was a freshman at Brown, he was on leave. And all I heard about was this Andy Van Dam. He was like a mythical creature. Like a centaur, but like a really pissed off centaur. And everybody was like really sad that he was gone, but kind of more relaxed? And I found out why. Because I started working for Andy. I was a teaching assistant for him as a sophomore. And I was quite an arrogant young man. And I came in to some office hours and of course it was nine o'clock at night and Andy was there at office hours, which is your first clue as to what kind of professor he was. And I come bounding in and you know, I'm just I'm going to save the world. There're all these kids waiting for help, da da, da da, da da, da da, da da. And afterwards, Andy literally Dutch-uncled – he's Dutch, right? He Dutch-uncled me. And he put his arm around my shoulders and we went for a little walk and he said, Randy, it's such a shame that people perceive you as so arrogant. Because it's going to limit what you're going to be able to accomplish in life. What a hell of a way to word your being a jerk. [laughter] Right? He doesn't say you're a jerk. He says people are perceiving you this way and he says the downside is it's going to limit what you're going to be able to accomplish.
除了我们的父母，我们的老师，我们的导师，我们的朋友，同事，都会帮助我们。上帝，有怎么说安迪凡丹呢？当我在布朗大学上大一时，他正在休假。但他的名字却是如雷贯耳。他像一个神话动物。就像（西腊神话中的）半马人，而且像一个愤怒的半马人。每个人都因他不在而难过，可又因此而觉得放松？我找到了原因。因为我开始为安迪工作。我上大二时做他的教学助理。我那时是一个很傲慢的年轻人。我在他的一些开放咨询时段去，当然是在晚上9点钟，而安迪总在那里，这也是你知道他是什么样的教授的第一个线索。我就蹦着走进来感觉自己像个救世主。这些孩子都等着我帮助，哒哒，哒哒，哒哒，哒哒，哒哒。之后，安迪做了我的“荷兰叔叔“ -他是荷兰人，对吧？他做了我的”荷兰叔叔“（英文“荷兰叔叔”意为严厉、不讲情面的“教诲者，译者注）。他用手臂圈着我的肩膀在外面走了走，兵然后说，兰迪，人们觉得你很傲慢，这真遗憾，这会影响你人生的发展的。这是怎样一个表达“你是个混蛋”的方式啊！[笑]对吗？他不说你是混蛋。他说，人们觉得你是，而这样会限制你的发展。
When I got to know Andy better, the beatings became more direct, but. [laughter] I could tell you Andy stories for a month, but the one I will tell you is that when it came time to start thinking about what to do about graduating from Brown, it had never occurred to me in a million years to go to graduate school. Just out of my imagination. It wasn't the kind of thing people from my family did. We got, say, what do you call them? Jobs. And Andy said, no, don't go do that. Go get a Ph.D. Become a professor. And I said, why? And he said, because you're such a good salesman that any company that gets you is going to use you as a salesman. And you might as well be selling something worthwhile like education. [long pause] Thanks.
当我更安迪熟了后，批评就直接多了。但， [笑] 我可以给你们讲一个月安迪的故事，但我要告诉你们的是，当到了开始思考从布朗毕业之后怎么做的时候，我没有一仃点要上研究生的想法。从未想过。它不是我们家人做的事。我们有，怎么称呼来着？工作。但安迪说，不，别去找工作。拿个博士学位，做一名教授。我问，为什么？他说，因为你是这么好的一个推销员，任何公司雇了你以后都会用你作推销员。你不如卖点有用的东西，比如教育。 [稍长停顿]谢谢。
Andy was my first boss......